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Many parents have good intentions about how they will raise their kids.
But do they have a plan for how to be the best parent they can be? One based on knowing each of their kids individually? Each day, are they intentional about how they spend time with them?
In other words, do they practice proactive parenting?
The Why, What, and How of Proactive Parenting
This is the last lesson of a series on proactive parenting. After completing the series, you can see the complete picture captured in these lessons and in the PACES for Parents methodology. Here is one way to think about the Why, What, and How of proactive parenting:
- The Why – Parents become more proactive and motivated as they focus on Preparation and Awareness of the challenges of parenting.
- The What – You will be better positioned to raise your kids effectively as you increase Connection and invest in parenting Education.
- The How – The proactive parenting material positions you to be a great parent, but it will be up to you to take the next right Steps.
These principles will work if you build them into a proactive parenting plan and remain intentional in your approach. They have been proven to help parents and kids, but they should be prioritized and adapted to meet the needs of your family. Each of your kids is their own person, individually designed by God to be something special. Who they are and their age and circumstances should be taken into account.
The How – Building a Proactive Parenting Plan
To be a great parent, you should build a plan. You can use the material in the Online Toolkit on “Proactive Parenting with Younger Kids.”
For each son or daughter, capture the top few most relevant principles, habits, and behaviors that relate to them. Then as an additional tool to help you envision the specific steps you should take, use the approach from the article “How to Be a Great Parent.” Below are the five areas that are part of being a GREAT parent. To help you get started, use these statements to capture what you will do in each area:
- Goals and Boundaries – Capture your objectives for being the best parent you can be.
- Relationship – Make commitments concerning your time and relationship with them.
- Example – Become more intentional about setting a positive, real example for them.
- Activities – Encourage them to get involved in positive activities they can embrace.
- Teaching – Ensure you are proactive in how you teach your kids with a specific plan.
The How – Being Intentional in Our Parenting
Each day, you can be a great parent by being intentional, managing your time, and making good choices on which areas to focus on with your kids. Using those same five focus areas of a G-R-E-A-T parent, capture your initial commitments for how you will raise your kids:
- Goals and Boundaries – Will you help them set goals to give them more purpose, even at an early age? Where should you set boundaries on their behavior, and where not? If you are going to pick your battles, which battles should you choose?
- Relationship – Do you put parenting time on your calendar? Will you stop what you are doing to be with them? How will you handle decisions such as the hours you put in at work, how much you travel, and whether you or your spouse should stay home with the kids?
- Example – What example will you plan on setting for your kids? Are there things you do now that may set a bad example? Will they see God in your life on a regular basis? How will you and your spouse be united and consistent with them?
- Activities – What positive activities would your kids enjoy participating in? Are there activities for which you need to set boundaries? Is there a hobby or activity you can share to spend time with them, or can you involve them in your hobby with you?
- Teaching – How will your kids be educated formally and informally? Will you be involved in their education? What values and lessons will you teach them, and how do you help them learn to like learning? Do you accept responsibility as their primary teacher?
It’s worth it to do your best, because parenting is one of the most important roles you will ever play. Proactive parenting begins with understanding Why you want to be the best parent you can be. Then it involves deciding What you will do to raise your kids effectively.
But to put proactive parenting into practice, you need to decide How you will take specific steps to be a great parent.
Question: For the sake of your family, are you willing to build a plan and be intentional in your parenting?
Action: Commit to use the material in the Online Toolkit on “Proactive Parenting with Younger Kids.”
